Mind your roots
Grandson, let me show you something. Can you see that hill over there? This is where Russian soldiers are buried and directly across the road there is an Austrian military cemetery. They both fought each other with bayonets far, far away from their hometowns in 1918.
Sounds like a pointless skirmish, doesn’t it? Not for Poles. Only two weeks ago we celebrated 100th anniversary of regaining independence thanks to the Treaty of Versailles in 1918. Before then, Polish soil was a helpless witness to imperial wars of foreign powers for 123 years. Even a small village of Hajowniki observed its fair share of historical struggles including two World Wars, Polish resistance and ethnic cleansing. Through my grandparents’ vivid stories I relive their trauma again and again every time I visit them.
Stay humble
Having been living abroad for 7 years now, going back home helps me re-baseline my understanding of the surroundings. It certainly rebuilds my humbleness towards the world that is so often lost in daily hustle. After all how can one think about building a yet another ML model when your relatives in their twenties were focused on rebuilding a country and getting higher education to escape the countryside? It is incredibly easy to move to a new, exciting city and be all consumed by its hype. One may all of a sudden be working on deals worth millions of dollars, but is it actually what really matters? Does one become a person to be reckoned with overnight? Surely it is a step but only the first one along a long and twisted road.
Bougie, the new Bourgeoisie
People often ask me why would I not indulge myself in daily pleasures the society offers and expects of Millennial Manhattan living. Yet I cannot reconcile going to expensive dinners, staying in upscale hotels, and upgrading my Lower East Side (not that I love my neighborhood but still) apartment with the contrast of countryside living of my relatives. Although a little far fetched, I do not want to succumb to a higher standard of living giving in to societal and peer expectations. Perhaps I may be old fashioned for it I see those golden handcuffs as potentially limiting my future options and mobility. To me money saved on rent can be of utmost importance when bootstrapping a new venture, extending its runway, or simply pursuing a long-desired passion for flying.
On the other hand, I find meaningful social activities infinitely more satisfying than pretentious ones so easy to find in NYC. To some extent I am reminiscent of the past studying in Cambridge where opportunities of being intellectual, artsy, and outdoorsy were bountiful. Writing this piece in a cozy cafe in Shanghai, deep down inside I know that a bento box of street food is so much more enjoyable than a posh meal experience back home.
Back to first principles
Have you ever taken your parents on a hiking trip?
I recently went on a family holiday where we spent a few days staying in tents in US national parks. Unsurprisingly my parents were initially taken aback as they have not done so since graduating from college in communist-at-the-time Poland. Yet they were surprised how easy and streamlined the experience is these days in the US. Despite initial hurdles of sleeping on the hard ground, they quickly adapted and appreciated waking up to the sun rising over magnificent canyons of US Southwest. Nature is a powerful stimulant for spending meaningful time with others while being away from the demanding, always-on culture. Similarly to doing sports, it democratizes the way people may spend time together regardless of their background. After all, no individual is immune to the powerful forces of Nature.
Spending active time outdoors with the people you care deeply about is very enriching. It allows for reconnecting with one’s true self and giving each other unlimited attention they deserve that is so hard to get in the iPhone era.
Don’t forget your roots.
Don’t forget those who care unconditionally.
Below is a set of pictures I took during my last trip back home in October 2018. They help me imagine what life used to be like 100 years ago.
